03/2021 (Temporarily Suspend for a year)

Long after the housing problem solved during all this period of staying hometown, I get restless and frustrated just as i was in Shanghai. It took me about 16 days to rethink the needs of my mind and life under the words of my parents and teachers(advisers), still not knowing which advice I should take.

taken in 2015.3 when I was an intern

Then, in the second half of this month, I went to Shanghai again to get a close experience of the state of struggling all by oneself with no relations' background in a place away from hometown.

I shall say the feeling isn't great, actually I can feel myself uncomfortable and unfamilar with the city.

Yes, it is, loneliness, far away from comfortable zone, not a decent life, inconvenient life.

But it encourages u to work hard to get promotions or make money, or u may get nothing after u pay ur golden time.

It seems that this time I can make up my mind to choose between ease and success in career. I record it below in a way that only native chinese can understand:

• 以往 996 忙碌的生活方式看似增加了薪水，但实际上却透支了未来；因为太过忙碌的工作，会占据并且损耗业余的个人进修和系统培训的时间(这部分时间，以往是你的上一代人下班买菜做饭，接孩子教育娃的时间)，然后导致个人在事业上似乎是技能更加熟练了，工作经验增加了，但实际上却仅仅只能维持现状，因为只是在随着时代更新知识技能储备而已，加速度不够，进而无法获得进一步的职业发展，晋升(即越来越胆小，不敢想高的目标，或者偏离原始目标和初心)。
• 人感觉到的是疲惫，也会感觉到迷茫或者意识到现状却无力改变；如果这时候人生几大件，比如房，伴侣，车等还没有打通的话，要么佛，要么焦虑，甚至逃离(包含知难而退，在大城市留不下来)，逃避责任。
• 所以，没有家可以回的人，这个代价其实很大；但问题是，如果你没有后顾之忧，却想着提前养老，那这就不对劲了。

And finally, I decide to REVISE MY LIFE and CAREER, put it short: sharpen myself  Officially .

• Offically: in a formal and public way, with the authority of the government or some other organization

more details provided in my chinese blog here: blog.yanyueio.com

02/2021 (family)

During the day-off of new year holidays, I spent most of my time on reading a novel named < 凡人修仙传·仙界篇 > which gave me a lot of thoughts written in my diary then.

01/2021 (return to routine)

In short, back to work. (仕事に戻る)

Support others and accomplish myself, win-win.

12/2020 (recharge before take charge of sth.)

After almost 2 months spent on the housing & decoration problem, it is the very time that I should do something beyond the peaceful life. Maybe I should consider being back to work.

While before that, it's necessary for me to recharge myself to take new challenges.

Charging myself with all the stuff about my job, which is mainly on:

• Software Engineering, ie: CMMI, MSF, Agile Development
• General Project Management, IT Project Management included, of course

11/2020 (down to earth, housing & neighbor)

I don't mean "Realistic". I mean get used to the flow of the local crowd.

Due to my coming back, my family reassigned a house and car to my own life.

And during this period, I have had some contacts with people of different classes. What I learn most deeply is that the citizens of this section are not saying the same language. I need to adjust the words according to their background.

For example, when I talked to a native-born and retired elder from the court about the second(二中) and sixth high(六中) schools, while I had to take the other words and talk about private schools instead of public schools anymore when I talked to a rich, old boss retired from the local city taxi company.

It can never be more astonishing compared with life living among young strugglers.

Elder from my family teach me that if u don't want make hard money, u need learn more about man and take huge risks.

Get used to it gradually quickly.

10/2020 (return 2 base)

2020 is a special year to me, like the startup year of BMW, Coca-Cola, IBM...

It takes me almost a month to reset or set up my home utilities, like docs, macs, cars, bills, (social)networks, relatives...

After all these work done, I find it Wuhan may not be as bad as I thought.

• 'cus in china, there is little discrimination of district by the form of account, I mean u could see many resources or welfares leaning to the locals(the lcoal citizen), which I met many times when I was in Shanghai
• No judgement or Criticism or Comment on this, I just express what I have experienced

And since I am not very short of money and lack of time (I don't have rent to pay, family to feed), I need think where am I gonna start from, carefully:

• Freelancer of outsourcing
• Or Employee of local company
• Or Parents' business

Q1: which business

According to the report of gov.'s investment:

Except for the mining industry, IT & Software is still a good choice.

Q2: freelancer or employee

Since the standard of the average income is quite low than I surveyed before, I need rethink it.

One small Item&Project for a freelancer is 50$ ~ 300$ Consuming not more than 5 days at this very beginning, which is higher than the salary of Wuhan where I can get now.

But one of the another stuff that I need take into consideration is Social Insurance.

• There are typically two kinds of insurances for ordinary/normal citizen...
• If u are not at high income level, then freelancer would not be a good choice

I set myself a standard of choices:

• Beyond 50$ per hour (or 40,000 per month), freelancer or boss
• Other situation: be an employee, stay hungry, stay foolish

Q3: developer or manager?

It depends ? No.

Step confirmly towards manager position under no compromise like salary, interst and any other stuff.

• Dynamic adjust, but the path/destination is oriented to manager, not cio, ceo and other job

Many thks to 《Horse Sense ...》Al Ries, Jack Trout.

revised at 10/09/2020

09/2020 (prepare for less)

Finally, I made my decision to go hometown(wuhan, just keep quiet and rest for a while) and live in my own house, to prepare my life and career for the extra time of life.

I send a lot of stuff home so that i can be more swift.

Imagine that there is a good team/group which invites you to enjoy them, what kindle of identity u gonna present urself ?

...

That's what I need prepare this month.

2020/08 (decision need)

stay or leave, that's a question

The first few days of this month I do not hesitate anymore, stay or leave, must be done at this month. After I think from top to bottom, from now to future and compare risk and return, I made myself a decision:

• Try my best to stay, but if it fails then leave quickly to adjust to new style life of my hometown.

Do u still remember the f**king reason why u are here? I do.(update at 2020/08/06)

07/2020 (parents require)

I start raising an orange cat which always eats too much as he is only 6 months old.

I start using english for my outputs(posts) including coding comments/annotations. And I was required to be a young boss of small tranditional business in a second level city(wuhan) with a trivial, idle living style.

But the price is high, I am struggling to break through, carefully.

06/2020 (shutdown my server)

Attention: Text of this part is out of date.